Historically, most of my coaching would be face to face and some of my coaching (usually when the coachee was in another country) would be by VC. In my coaching conversations over the past 18 months I have seen a number of recurring themes. Themes such as; using emotional Intelligence to influence, building resilience to recover from setbacks, being more curious in order to be creative & think differently and dealing with difficult people in order to deliver outcomes.
In the past six weeks all coaching has been by VC and, while the above themes remain as prevalent as ever, the new question I am now asked by coachees is – ‘what are the characteristics of people who are leading/functioning best in lockdown?’
For some, understandably, surviving is the critical concern right now, while others seek ‘thriving’. Personal circumstances and individual personalities vary significantly. However, regardless of where you want/need to be on the ‘survive-thrive scale’, in my experience there are four critical factors that differentiate those who continue to be able to act during Covid-19. Please note this is subjective; based on real conversations my colleagues and I have had with leaders.
1. Keep what is the same in perspective
Journalists and management consultants like to make a thing of ‘how different’ everything is now – it’s a new world! it will never be the same again! etc. However, many of the outcomes leaders are currently dealing with at work continue to be the same as six weeks ago – deliver results, influence, deal with or resolve problems, make tough decisions, recover from setbacks. Many of the interfaces have stayed the same: the business, the people, the stakeholders, the customers. Even in lockdown, many aspects of day-to-day life are the same – wake up, get up, eat, travel to work, work & kids interrupt, work, eat, work, travel back from work, carry on working, eat, sleep.
So, most people I coach are doing broadly similar things, some are doing exactly the same things. Many people I coach have more time and many have less time (especially if they have small kids/illness to deal with). However, the continual focus on what is different (and typically worse than before), rather than the perspective of what is the same, is a magnificent catalyst for procrastination.
the continual focus on what is different (and typically worse than before), rather than the perspective of what is the same, is a magnificent catalyst for procrastination.
Spend time (kids and pets permitting) focusing on and progressing the outcomes you want to achieve (which typically haven’t changed), rather than lamenting what has changed and becoming distracted.
2. Anchoring
How long does it take you to get going? I have coachees who have confessed to just doing what they feel like doing rather than need to do. I have other coachees who are able to override what they feel like doing very quickly because they metaphorically ‘throw down an anchor’ and get on with it. What they feel like doing does not interfere with the decision to start doing something and once they have started, they are off!
they metaphorically ‘throw down an anchor’ and get on with it
Not feeling like doing something is a choice. You not feeling like writing a report does not stop you from actually writing it – you choose not to write it, or better still, you just write it. A simple but effective tip when you don’t feel like doing something is to slowly count to 10 and as you count, start taking positive steps to starting it.
Let’s take an example of two athletes: Athlete 1 does not feel like training early morning on a cold dark winter’s day and decides to stay in bed vs. Athlete 2 who feels exactly the same, but knows that getting their kit on will ‘anchor’ them to training. 1 open the cupboard with sports kit in, 2 grab the kit, 3…. I think you get the drift by now. Once your kit is on, the prospect of lying in bed has gone and the idea of heading to the gym or track is more real.
3. Emotionally revising expectations
Irrespective of any formal work targets, individuals have a personal calibration of what ‘feels good’ in terms of achievement. I appreciate the two can be closely linked. There are two points to understand with revising emotional expectations which can also be slightly contradictory.
The first is keeping expectations up-to-date and in line with the current situation (not your work targets, but what you really believe is achievable in your context). E.g. If half your customers are not able to buy your product or service due to lockdown, do you really expect the same sales as if 100% percent of your customers could buy?
The second point is having a balanced view of what gives you worth. I.e. is your work target (which you can only 50% achieve) the only sense of worth you get from work? Or, do you get a sense of worth from something else at work? I am finding that where an individual focusses on getting worth from realistic calibrations of achievement and pride beyond KPIs, their ability to thrive is greater.
4. Focusing on opportunities to thrive
If your focus is entirely on replaying all the things that are going wrong, it is very hard to find mental space to focus on what could be going well, or indeed in the scheme of things, could be going even better.
some of the ‘thrivers’ have worked out that two small extra things a day (one in the morning and one in the afternoon) can deliver 10 marginal gains a week
I am seeing a significant difference between individuals who are able to identify ways to deliver more value vs individuals who just want to get through the day. I appreciate that getting through the day may the best that some people can hope for. However, some of the ‘thrivers’ have worked out that two small extra things a day (one in the morning and one in the afternoon) can deliver 10 marginal gains a week. For limited effort those marginal gains will add up.
Conclusion
So, returning to the topics at the start and the four differences I have identified, nothing has changed and a lot has changed. Your personal circumstances may limit what you can or cannot do. However, you CAN make a choice to keep a perspective between what is the same and what has changed, anchor well, set appropriate personal expectations and wherever possible and however small, look to thrive rather than survive. You may not always be able to, but that is never a reason not to try.
My time is up. I don’t feel like going for a walk but I said I would once I finished this blog. I will put my shoes on now and I am confident that by the end of the walk I will feel good for having been on a walk. Bye for now!
To learn more about our approach to coaching virtually, please contact Paolo Moscuzza.